~Q: What can you use a Family Constellation for? Why might I be interested in a Constellation?~

A: Family Constellations are for people who have patterns in their life that no matter what they do remain stuck or blocked, or otherwise find themselves repeating the same unwanted patterns as their parents or others in their family.

These patterns can be in any area, including:

• Business/Job/Career
• Money
• Relationships (clients, friends, family, romantic partners)
• Health
• Love life
• General happiness and wellbeing
• Self love and ability to feel valuable and worthy
• Depression, anxiety

And lots more

~Q: Who created Family Constellations? Where did it come from?~

A: Family Constellations was created by Bert Hellinger, a German psychoanalyst based on his 50+ years’ experience working with families and observing family dynamics.

Hellinger was a missionary and spent some time with the Zulu in South Africa who showed him the power of ancestry and freeing people from ancestral binds. It was here he observed people sitting in circles and “communing with the ancestors” as a way of freeing people from ancestral binds and helping with current day problems.

Bert’s work is informed by his 50+ years practical experience with clients and his studies in:

• Psychoanalysis
• Gestalt therapy,
• Transactional analysis
• Primal therapy
• Hypnotherapy
• NLP
• Family therapies with Ruth McCledon and Leslie Kadis
• Hellinger’s work with Milton Erickson
• Hellinger’s 16 years as a missionary with the South African Zulu
• 1980s family systems work of Virginia Satir

~Q: What happens in a constellation? ~

A constellation is done for one specific client but facilitated using a group of unrelated people as representatives for the client’s family members.

The client comes with a challenge they would like a resolution to.

A group of people come together to hold space and if willing, volunteer to “represent” different roles within the family system.

This helps reveal the subconscious and often hidden dynamics –things that have been pushed under the carpet and “forgotten” about. When the family tries to “forget about” someone or something that has happened (e.g. someone is cast out, aborted, commits suicide, an unacknowledged tragedy occurs…), it creates imbalances within the system that subconsciously move through generations.

By revealing these hidden dynamics and openly acknowledging what needs to be acknowledged, without any attachment of blame or shame or good/bad/right/wrong, the imbalances and entanglements can be resolved, enabling the client to be let go of having to carry the family pain and suffering, and have the opportunity to experience profound changes in their life.

Change is open and available to not just the client, but anyone there. Often, people who are participating as representatives, or even just sitting and observing, find they also get change in their lives.

~Q: Why do we reach for this family pain and suffering?~

When someone or something is excluded from the family system (e.g. someone is cast out, aborted, commits suicide, murdered, war trauma, an unacknowledged tragedy occurs…), this causes imbalances and entanglements that later generations try to fix and heal.

When we are very young, we see our parents in pain and reach for their pain, to try to “rescue” them and others who have come before us.

In reaching for the pain, we try to help our families in one of three ways:

1. Loving the pain into submission;

2. Taking on the pain so that others (our mothers, fathers, grandmothers, grandfathers etc.) don’t have to;

3. As our last resort we say, “If it was like this for you [mother/father/grandmother/great-grandfather], I won’t have it any better than you, I promise”.

Then we often find ourselves repeating the same patterns as our mothers/fathers/grandparents… and often people from earlier generations we know nothing about.

~Q: How might you get change when it’s not your constellation?~

A: Change is not guaranteed, however is open and available to not just the client, but anyone there. Often, people who are participating as representatives, or even just sitting and observing, find they also get change in their lives following a constellation.

This is based on “sympathetic resonance”.

Think of two tuning forks or two bells that are tuned to the same resonance or frequency. When you hit one bell, other bells that are tuned to the same resonance or frequency will also sound. Similarly, if your family system carries similar pain or challenges, change is also available to you and your family system where things are ready to move.

~Q: Where can I find out more? What are some other references:~

A: Some other resources are:

• Rupert Sheldrake morphic fields and family systems: https://youtu.be/JydjryhEl5o
• Bert Hellinger’s book “Love’s Hidden Symmetry” (the creator of this modality)
• Mark Wollyn’s book “It Didn’t Start with You” (a more accessible read)
• Michelle Masters – more information and example zoom constellation: https://youtu.be/GhQhBgW59NA

~Q: I have more questions~

A: If you have any other questions just get in touch and we can schedule a call to chat through any questions, queries or concerns.

Some things previous Constellation clients have said:

I’m so awestruck by how much has changed in a year… I really, truly did not want to live… so thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you

Get in contact via email with any questions or to set up a chat to see if a constellation is right for you